I’ve always said that I have made a commitment to breastfeed Ziggy exclusively for the first six months of his life. I just feel that it is my responsibility as a mother to give him the best and that includes the best in nutrition, which is my breast milk. That is why, it’s so hard to actually articulate what we’re going through now because I am feeling very disappointed in myself.
You see, when Ziggy was born last Monday, the hospital decided to give him formula during his first feeding. Why? Well, for the stupid reason that when they called to check if I was ready, the recovery room person said that I wasn’t because I was still in recovery. The thing is, they didn’t even bother asking me if I was up to the task. I was just there in the recovery room for at least 3 hours doing nothing and absolutely bored to death. I only found out that they gave him formula after I was already transferred to my hospital room. I was only allowed to breast feed my baby a few hours after that and I wasn’t even successful in doing so. When we got to the nursery, Ziggy was sleeping. No amount of coaxing on my part could get him to open his mouth so he could feed. Take note that Kai and I stayed there trying for 2 hours, to no avail. The good thing was that we were able to room him in the same day he was born so I was able to keep trying to breast feed until we went home the next day.
It was very frustrating that I only really started expressing milk 3 days after Ziggy was born. Though I know that Ziggy was able to at least get colostrum even when the milk wasn’t there yet, I felt like it wasn’t enough. He wanted more than what I could give. Also, I got really sore from all the sucking. At one point, Ziggy bit too hard on my left nipple and I ended up bleeding a little. Now that I am able to lactate already, he can breastfeed fine on my right though it still hurts a bit sometimes. My problem is with my left side. He hasn’t really been able to latch properly. That is the reason why I started pumping my left just so I could express my milk. That way I could still alternate using my right and left. However, using a manual pump is a pain and an electric one is too expensive. It takes me a 30 minute pumping session just to express 1 oz and usually that’s not enough for Ziggy for one feeding. I would have to pump every 2 hours just to be able to try and keep up. With me being so tired, plus with two other kids to take care of I don’t know if I can keep up. Still, I’m grateful that the pump is helping me not waste my breast milk. Without it, I would be a total failure at this.
At this point, we are still into mixed feeding since my supply can’t seem to keep up with Ziggy’s demands. It makes me feel sad and disappointed not to be able to breast feed exclusively. Some friends of mine are trying to be encouraging, but a part of me deep inside already wants to give up. I really hope things will start to improve.
keep on feeding him na lang regularly para dumami milk supply mo. don’t give up 🙂
Don’t give up! I breastfed my first baby, not knowing that I had low milk supply. She was hungry all of the time and I could not satisfy her. We supplemented one of her nighttime and one daytime feeding with soy formula. She is a perfectly healthy and strong 13 year old now.
Because feeding her was so hard and my milk did not come in during the first week with my second child, I opted to bottle feed only. That child has dealt with severe allergies all of her life. I firmly believe that it is because she missed out on the little bit of “mother’s milk” that her sister had. Hang in there for as long as you can! It will definitely be worth it!!!
Commenting from “Bloggy Moms.”
hi dothy. I don’t think it’s the milk supply that’s the problem eh. I have milk it’s just that he’s not latching on my left breast. I have an inverted nipple. My right one isn’t so he’s able to latch properly there.
Stopping by to say hi from the Sunday Blog Hop. Good luck to you I had the hardest time with breastfeeding on all 4 kids but I got better and lasted longer with each one.
Stop by any time.
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Thanks for joining the Weekend Blog Hop on I Heart Maternity. Congrats on your new little one. He is so precious. I am adding your blog to my Expecting Now What section so other new moms can find you.
I would love got you to guest post on I Heart Maternity about having a newborn baby boy after having girls that are at least 8 years old. I’m sure you have alot to share. If you’re interested email me!
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You’re tuggin at my heartstrings!! I had a very similar situation with my 1st. Nursing was not going well but I wasn’t about to give up. I even lost the support from my husband and family before it finally started going better. I did buy a really nice pump from the hospital and although I still cringe thinking about the price, I don’t know what I would have done with out it!! Baby #2 was a breeze. Baby 3 had problems. They kinda have their own kind of thing going on sometimes I think! Best of luck to you and please drop me a line if you need to talk about it. A worried momma sometimes needs to vent, right!? I am a new follower from the I Heart Maternity Weekend Hop! I love your blog design!! Would love a follow back at http://www.kylakreates.blogspot.com. Thanks!!
Thank you so much for the support, you guys. I am truly pleasantly surprised and overwhelmed. I really appreciate the messages. It is great to know that there are a lot of you who understand what I am going through. It gives me the willpower to keep going.
Visited all your blogs already. 😀 Thanks again!