When I first thought about writing this post, I already had an idea on what to say but somehow, right now I find myself at a loss for words. So, allow me to just ramble on as things come into my mind.
If you’ve been patiently reading this blog, you’d know I haven’t been blogging much lately because I’ve been busy with this new job I started at the beginning of December. You’d also know that it wasn’t a job that I particularly wanted but took anyway because it presented a whole new world of possibilities and opportunities in the future. It was inviting enough for me to give up my dream job because it was the more logical and practical choice. Well, that decision did not really turn out as well as we (hubby and I) had hoped.
The thing is, I was doing well in my job. Despite my initial worries, I was actually doing better than I expected and was beginning to feel like I could survive the job long enough to stay for one year, which was the minimum requirement before I can transfer to another position in another department. Unfortunately, something happened that made staying in the company impossible. I’d rather not divulge the reason why. Suffice it to say that I am not happy about it. It has been three days since my last day at work and I am still in a bit of a shock about the whole thing. In the back of my mind, I was expecting it to happen but was hopeful it wouldn’t because I had actually formed good friendships in the company and was really looking forward for big things to come. So, when it did happen it really felt like such a blow. I still don’t know how to deal with it. I am still weighing the possibilities. I pray to God to show me what I need to do.
Right now, I am back at home and back at being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM), at least for a while. The truth is, despite of the shock (and the pain), I am happy to be home. There were many things that had to be sacrificed by me accepting that job. Now, I can finally go back to doing things that actually make me happy. The only trouble there is the fact that losing the job of course also means losing the income. But, I believe everything happens for a reason. I remember praying to God when I initially decided on taking that job. I asked God, that if that job is really not meant for me, then please give me a sign. I asked for a sign that will leave me no choice but to not have that job anymore. He answered my prayers, although not in the way that I expected. I should still be thankful, though. I don’t want to spend so much time and effort on something that was never really meant for me anyway.
Now, the challenge is on finding which path I have to take. It’s already February but I just feel like my 2012 is just beginning. Let me re-start my new year. I may not be able to change what already happened, but I still have control about my future.
you have even more curious with the reason behind it… im sure it’ll work out. good luck!
xoxo, Zahara Tales
I’m so sorry things ended the way they did. It makes it all worse. Praying for a better and bigger opportunity to come your way.